The Day i wished i had rubber..

NO.... it has nothing to do with sex, :)
n YES... that IS the thought that came to into your head first, now don't u deny it! :P


Now that i have your attention, let me start from scratch. :)

It all started when i went looking for the professor who was in charge of my posting cos i wanted leave to enjoy my long weeekend home... Finally found him n realized he was taking an "improvement ELECTRO THERAPY practical exam" for some of my juniors... My gut instinct made me turn around n walk back but damn he saw me n called out.

I told him i wanted him to sign my form ("please").....
He told me he wanted a model for electrical stimulation ("you finished treating your patients right?"). :(

Now i couldn't refuse since i really needed that signature. So there i was sittin (i took care it was a wooden chair.. good conductors at the moment didn't seem very "good" to me) waiting for the kid to electrocute me (ok i know we use low voltage stuff but still.. it can give u a burn or a not-so-mild shock if not done properly). The prof asked him to stimulate a distal muscle supplied by the median nerve (nerve in the upper limb).. and he says "ok sir, i'll stimulate flexor hallucis longus (a muscle of the toe)" :O :O.... the professors slap their foreheads n say "Forget it! You know what jus stimulate the brachioradialis (the most bulky and superficial muscle of the forearm). And i was thinking ":O Mr.God are u kidding me!!!! is this how u want me to die!!! like a fried banana... at the hands of an kid playing with shocky thingies?? :( like a fly in a sidey sweet shop with Pest-o-killer... like mosquitoes at the hands of those who love playing tennis but never made it BIG n stuck to those electric machchar-killing-racquet's sold on the streets!!!!!!"

So the fella makes me sit with my arm propped on a pillow and i told him to do all the experimentation he wanted on my left (oh c'mon.. whats a physiotherapist without her dominant hand now?) He makes me tell him the motor point n some other stuff when the prof wasn't looking, and i obliged (quicker he gets his work done, fewer shocks i receive). Meanwhile i take off all the jewellery i was wearing, thanking myself for not being one of those rebellious teenagers piercing their navels and what not.... also damning the iron shakti wala Kellogs i had eaten that morning. (hey i've seen Xmen okay.. if Magneto could use it.. i dont underestimate this kid!)

now lemme tell u how it goes when done right, first thr r 2 electrodes, an inactive one which is a plate covered in dripping wet piece of cloth placed at ur biceps level, and an Active electrode which is a pen electrode which is placed on the spot of the motor point.. place it there n slowly increase the intensity till the patient can tolerate it (doesnt really hurt actually just make that muscle contract, kinda magical).. if point not found then drag the elctrode around DONOT lift it n place it back before shutting the intensity off.

But what happened was,
1. He forgot to make the cloth around the inactive wet, i was tempted to not tell him cos then no current would be felt and i'd live!!......... but then i felt sorry for him n said "dude isnt this supposed to be wet?" pointing at it and he goes "oh ya so sorry im so forgetful na!!" and THEN instead of making the cloth wet he takes a tiny piece of cotton and wets my skin :O eventually after a minute when my skin dried i stopped feeling the current (his ignorance, my bliss).. then another friend of his told him he was to make the cloth wet so it doesnt dry so fast.
2. He uses galvanic current instead of faradic, after i told him thats not the one he assures me that he knows what he is doing... (galvanic firstly is way more painful, and secondly doesnt give a properly visible contraction)
3. He constantly lifts the electrode instead of dragging it which gives me a shock everytime he places it back on me, finally i had to threaten him to make him stop lifting it. (My friends by then were also called to be models for the others and they lay in front of me with their legs on pillows getting treated with ultrasound which BTW is so not painful! and they also got a clear view of me jumping off my seat every 20 seconds)
4. When he doesn't see a contraction he goes "wait alright i think i know what im doing wrong" (FINALLY....) and exchanges the electrodes, makes the humongous plate the active one and the tiny pen the inactive, giving me an even greater shock in my arm (WHAT THE ****!!?!?!?!)!!!
Thats when i involuntarily squeaked when stimulated and my professor comes in saying "Priyanka, u seem tense would u like some coffee, tea anything? :) " and i go "yeah could i have a pair of rubber chappals please... :(( "
5. He doesn't even know what action the muscle he is stimulating produces and hence didn't know what he should've been looking for.... that means i was shocked outta my wits and almost had past life visions for an hour without any reason!


Mr.God up there sure has a sense of humour, i bet he was watching me with a can of coke and a bowl of popcorn!! Grrr... :X