“There are some things in life books can’t teach you”…. Its been said a gazillion times… as obedient as i am, its not shocking that I never really wasted much time reading too many and I’m talking about the kind of books you LEARN from, mind you (the boring-sorta-learn)
Annnnnnyway … today I’m an intern (thank you Mr.God), I lived the worst year in the life of a BPT student (21 subjects, in one academic year, is serious bullshit) … And now I feel like Free Willy (the whale...:P).. but then came the “okay so I’m free… yay! But now what?!!?” kinda feeling.
When One gets that feeling One starts to think about the things One would normally not actually bother thinking about.. and for a Thinker like me who unconsciously thinks about every think-able thought thought … Its paaaarrrrdddy tiiime! 8)
Ok so here are a couple of things that i probably learned.. I’ll try and go year-wise so I don’t miss too many..
1. “the woman you see most around you and does the cooking is your Mom… the man you see most around you and is the tallest person you have ever seen in your entire life (even if your "entire life" is only about a yr or two) is your Dad… the other fellow who transforms into pure evil when mom and dad are not around… that is your Big brother”
2. “He may be 5 times more capable of pounding you but you are 10 times more capable of getting him pasted by both your parents...”
3. “Barbie dolls are no fun… they are dolls that are as tiny as my arms and cannot move their elbows or knees and cannot blink... what good is that?!?!?! :O”
4. “Barbie dolls are not how actual girls grow up to be... trust me i've grown up and been pretty confused at times!”
5. “If you're the ‘limbu-timbu’ of a game it means you have the license to cheat”
6. “After a fall, never shake a tooth that’s already shaking”
7. “if you hear your grandmother wail about her only granddaughter not having front teeth (its been over a year since... who will marry a girl with no front teeth!!!) .. you are going to the hospital”
8. “X-rays don’t hurt”
9. “When you want something really bad… ask for it when the adult is groggy"
10. “when you don’t want something really bad… procrastinate until the adult feels sorry for you… if he/she doesn’t then you’re gonna get pasted big time”
11.“throwing soggy wet cotton balls on walls or windows is the coolest thing ever”
12.“throwing soggy wet cotton socks on the ceiling is not only the coolest thing ever but it will also help you miss your school bus the next morning”
13.“sitting on a dead rat doesn’t cause localized-bum-plague”
14. “Jurassic Park is a movie not a park”
15. “don’t stand around a kid who plans on throwing a brick into fresh cow shit”
16. “watching advertisements is not the why man invented television”
17. “Just cos it claims to be UNBREAKABLE doesn’t mean it really is”
18. “Moving to a new city sucks!”
19. “The idea of moving to a ‘newer’ city makes you realize the ‘new’ city isn’t that bad”
20. “Dammit should’ve just moved to the newer city!”
21. “Braces bring luck”
22. “Never trust your physics lab assistant.... and your 'i-think-thats-what-the-prof-said-instinct'.”
23. “Learn from your mistakes (never burn a battery while performing the same experiment the second time)... BUT to err is human (its alright if it begins to smoke during a different one)”
24. “Just because Manipal is not a jungle anymore doesn't mean it hasn't gotten wilder”
25. "Don't judge a person by his/her appearance... no seriously... don't..."
26. “To be blissful… IGNORE 8)”
27. “Hibernating may not be a natural process in your life cycle but sometimes it does get necessary…"
P.S. although always remember to GET IN AND GET OUT!!!
28. "Sometimes some things just cannot be changed, even if one wants to so bad, even if one believes one can… its just imprinted in your genes, a free manual you’re born with whether you like it or not"
29. "Your presence in the passport office doesn't count as your PROOF OF BIRTH" (oh...also... the renewal form says GENDER: Male Female Other.. :D talk about being open minded! :D way to go!)
30. "Watching an Adam Sandler movie is not a Family-time thing"
31. "Always wear excess layer of clothing while you play a game of JENGA TRUTH OR DARE.. :D... ALWAYS! "
32. "When a boy say he loves you.. DONOT panic and run faster than the wind even if you are only 8 years old and you have no idea why a 7 year old boy 'LOVES-you'-loves-you.... you don't wanna be damned by the Love-Goddess now do you?"
33. "If you possess the gift of shuttin out the sound of your alarm in the morning, change your alarm tone to your roomy's ringtone... that way even if the alarm doesn wake u a highly pissed roomy sure will" :P
6 comments:
“sitting on a dead rat doesn’t cause localized-bum-plague”
:D Hahahaha...nice one!
so what does "Free Willy", (the whale of course :P) plan to do now? :)
We waste more than half of our lives reading bulky books 4 knowledge, but v 4get the chapters that life teaches us. Thanx 4 reminding those nice moments of life that v tend to 4get coz v wanna be grown ups. Reading ths i came to knw that thr is a small baby priyanka in every child or rather every child grows following the funny n interesting course as u did ma fren!!
This is without a doubt one of the funniest and most original pieces of writing I have come across in a long time! Amazing! Your blog really made my day :D
@ Shakir: thanks.. and your comment jus made mine :)
@ Deep: we're all a part of a big cosmic joke buddy :)
@Vatsa: i plan to SAVE THE WORLD! 8)
LOL that was AWESOME!
Hilarious!
18. “Moving to a new city sucks!”
19. “The idea of moving to a ‘newer’ city makes you realize the ‘new’ city isn’t that bad”
-Couldn't agree more!!!
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